Thursday, October 30, 2008

Boots and Sweaters

With my Cinnamon Dolce Latte in hand and a smile on my face I begin my chilly day. I love chilly days its the perfect time to pick up a great book or have lunch at an outside cafe. Or of course you could do my favorite hobby of shopping. Which reminds me that Aldo has super cute boots for fall and winter. When cold fronts come through I really appreciate them because it allows us to wear our super cute winter Plus it changes up the scene a little.
Though this week has been really hard to make it through. With the passing of my grandfather. But I have come to realize that he would not want me to sit back and be sad. I just have to remember that he is with me everyday. He's my angel now...
Today I seemed to have found inner peace and therefore I was able to have a great day. Inner peace is something we should all have. There have been a lot of ups and downs but I have finally found myself again. I'm no longer letting the little things get to me. Life really is too short to be upset or stress out over the little things. I find happiness in the little things like a good cup of coffee, a night with the girls or even a good phone call. I just love my life and I'm trying to live it to the fullest everyday. Everything I go through good or bad makes me the person I am now.
I have decided to open up my heart to love again. I refuse to let one bad apple ruin it for the rest. It has taken me a lot to get to this point but I don't want to lose out on my one great love due to a bad break up. I believe when you have love you have everything.
Sorry, I'm skipping topics so quickly... my mind is truly all over the place. I promise that my next blog will stay on topic. I'm about to start my wonderful day. It's so nice outside and I'm off....I don't even know what to do with Much love to all my blogheads...
PS....I'm just a little upset with someone in my inner circle..I have done so much for this person and when I need then they can't help me out. Oh well....just wanted to vent quickly about that.

Friday, October 24, 2008

To Grandpa with love

On October 19, 2008 at 8:45 p.m. my grandfather passed away. He is and was the best man I have ever known. Words can not express how much I miss him. Though we knew it was coming sooner or later it his us harder than we ever expected. Him and my grandma have been married for 61 years and they have true love. They have raised 5 children, helped raised 14 grandchildren, and also helped raised 4 great grandchildren. All his children and grandchildren feel as though they are the favorite. That just shows how wonderful he was. While in the war my grandfather was given a purple heart because he went back in the line of fire to save a fellow soldier.

For as long as I can remember he has always been there for me. At a very young age my grandfather nicknamed me Pollywog even in his last days he called me it. All throughout my school days he waited for me to walk home from school or even picked me up. He always cooked me Ramon Noddle Soup or Applesauce sandwiches...I doubt that I would eat the sandwiches today. I was the luckiest grandchild because I was able to spend so much time with him. We had a very special bond will always be dear in my heart. If you know my grandfather and I personally then you know the relationship we have. I felt like besides my grandmother, I was the apple of his eye. Though he was hard on us, he made us the people we are today.

Grandpa, I will never forget the stories you told us about your childhood or even the war. Even though I still don't like carrot cake I will always remember the day you made us sit at the table and eat carrot cake. I never forget baking with you or even the road trips up north. I miss watching wrestling with you. Every time I look at my tattoo, I will think about the lecture that you and grandma gave me. I will never forget the day you and grandma renewed your vows. There wasn't a dry eye in the house. You two were truly meant for each other. I truly cherish all the memories that we have made together.

Grandpa you are my hero. I hope you know how much I truly respect you. Thank you for fighting for the freedom that we have today. You truly showed us what strength was, you were in pain everyday and yet continued to have a smile on your face. Thank you for holding the family together when grandma had breast cancer. You are my superman. I could keep going on about all the great things you have done.

I told him everyday that I loved him and I hope he never forgets that. I promise to take care of grandma for you and to come visit you as much as I can. I will never forget what you taught me. You always stressed the importance of education, self discipline and that family comes before everything. I will go back to school because I know that is what you would want me to do.Thank you so much for creating a wonderful family. I can only hope that I can have a family that will be in the likeliness of ours. Please be our angel and watch over us. Help us make the right decision. Even though you are not here on earth you will forever be in our hearts. I love you grandpa and may you rest in peace. Your pollywog misses you more than ever. Hugs and kisses.

***I wanted to post a picture of my grandfather and I but was not able to at this will be posted soon***

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Family Ties

I have been blessed with an amazing family. I have wonderful grandparents, parents, aunts, unlces' and cousins. Even though I am an only child I have my two cousins that are like my sisters, Kristen and Nikki.Kristen is my best friend and sister. She is always there when I need her, during the last couple of months we have needed each other evenly. Our nicknames are Ebony and We can always be found together like peanut butter and jelly or salt and can't have one without the other. And if you do it just isn't the same. I would do anything for her, whatever she needs I make it happen no matter what. Nikki is her sister. Her and I are close as well. I'm always willing to help her. I guess together we would make the 3 stooges. Out of all the cousin we are the closest. Nikki is a fun loving wild child and I mean that in the best way lol. During a time like this our family has pulled together and supported each other. No matter what our differences and fights we put them all aside for my grandparents. I wish that everyone would be lucky enough to have a family like ours. My only hope is that I will be able to pass down all the traditions and values that I have learned from my family.

Thursday, October 16, 2008


Love...where do I even began. We all have a chance it at it just depends whether we take it or not. I feel that I have only been in love twice before. There was my high school sweetheart and my most recent ex. There are people like my grandparents who find it and make it last forever. Then there are people who give up when times get rough. I have always hoped for love like my grandparents. The best way to describe it would be the movie The Notebook.

Now if I were to sit here and say I don't love me ex that would be a lie. I'm going to love him forever. Him and I have and had good times and bad times. He knows that I'm in love with him and I know that he's in love me. In many ways I believe that he is the one for me. We have put each other through a lot in the last couple of months. We have crossed that line into hate once or twice. But at the end of the day my heart is with him. He once told me that I love him unconditionally which is true. I love him for the person he is and the person I am when I'm with him. I don't love him for what he can buy for me or what he can do for me...I simply love him for him. Now I know me talking about loving him so much is strange because we are no longer together but there is always a chance that we might work through this. For a long time I had given up on love myself.

I always struggle with the fact that being in love cause pain. Even if you spend your entire life with someone and they pass you end up with a broken heart. Or if you are with someone for a while and then they all of a sudden fall out of love with you. Then you end up with a broken heart. When people say love is for suckers I understand it because its a big risk to fall in love. You could always end up getting hurt but if you don't take a shot at love you can lose out on even more. As of right now my love is on lockdown. The course of love never runs smoothly...there are many ups and downs. As long as you are a strong couple and have trust then you will be able to with stand anything. I wanna take some time to show some love to some couples that I truly respect and admire: my grandparents, Nellz and Turbo, April and Kurt, Patty and Tim, Kristen and Tony and any other couple I forgot.

**Sidenote** Yesterday was my grandfather 86th Birthday. I'm was glad to be able to spend this day with him. I love you are my world!